And the Season 10 winner is . . . . .

The last show of the season and the winner is announced. This season did fly by! Is there really any reason for this show to be 2 freakin hours? Oh I know! FRIGGIN COMMERCIALS! And of course we have Mr. Dufus in another tux. I bet it was the same one he had on last night. This dude will never change (his clothes or anything else!) He keeps talking about all these voting records being broke. What he doesn’t say is that of course there is no cap on the number of times someone can vote. I still don’t believe the numbers. Scotty and Lauren are all dressed in white – they do this every year. For the first number they have the top 13 singing ‘Born This Way’ by GaGa. They are all in white as well for the usual cheesy choreographed number. But all in all when they are all put together they didn’t sound too, well, not all that great. I missed James’s performance – had to eat again. I missed Drama Queens performance on purpose! Now we got Casey singing ‘Flat Bottom Girls’ with Jack Black. Both of them dressed in gray suits with white shirts and black skinny ties. I approve. That was OK. Just OK. Next up all the ladies of the top 13. They be singing ‘Put A Ring On It’ They are all dressed up in red and black and all of um lookin fine! As far as the performance – it was OK. Didn’t blow me away. However when Beyonce walked out – now there is a different story! She’s so hot! And singing ‘Crazy Right Now’ – To sweet! Haley is singing with Tony Bennett – ‘Steppin Out’ – She’s in a black and silver sweet short dress, hair down and all fine! She looks hot! OK, the dude that was jumpin all over the stage – don’t know who that was but he was just ridiculous! So far this whole show is like ‘American Idol Losers Meets the Make-A-Wish Foundation Variety Hour’. Don’t think it’s gonna get any better. Now we got Scotty and Tim McGraw singing ‘Live Like You Were Dying’. Now there’s a pick me upper! That’s the song they chose to sing? Every time I hear that song – makes me want to open a vein. Couldn’t listen to it – Told Rusty to let me know when it was over. Ryan keeps saying that this is the best talent that America has to offer. Well, the economy is in the crapper and so is the talent – guess everything is going down. So Marc Anthony is going to treat us – Makes sense – you get to sing if you’re married to one of the judges. The only thing that he’s done that I liked was ‘Maria’. He ain’t done anything to impress me since and tonight is no exception. Two seconds into his performance I tuned out. Never thought I’d be glad for the commercials to come back but they are more entertaining at this point. Next the top 13 guys are singing a melody of songs and all dressed in black. Appropriate that they are dressed all in black – nuff said. Just looked at the clock – it’s 9:12. Only 48 more minutes to go! Whoa! Tom Jones done got all gray. How old is that dude? Hold on. OK, Just looked it up – He’s 70. So, OK. Now when Scotty and Lauren gave the keys to a new car to their teachers – Now that was cool! Best part of the show so far. And next we have GaGa singing ‘On The Edge’ – I have no idea what she’s on when she comes up with all of these costumes but I’d be willing to give it a try! Wish I had it now! Just looked at the clock again – its 9:26. Lauren starts off singing ‘Before He Cheats’ and out walks out Carrie! She looks amazing in an off the shoulder silver flashy shirt and white hot pants! Carrie, not Lauren. And we continue with Bono to keep filling up the time. That whole thing was just weird with Spiderman. Now it’s 9:48. Hold on now – The show just got good! Steven Tyler is singing ‘Dream On’. Now that was awesome! He ended it to freakin early! But so far THAT was the best part of the Variety Hour. Well they are still playing commercials and my PC and my phone say that it is 10:01. As usual they have added to much damn fluff! For the big announcement Lauren chooses to wear a yellow prom dress – She looked like Big Bird. Scotty is in a gray jacket, white shirt and jeans – He’s so flashy. AND FINALLY THE WINNER IS . . . . . Scotty aka Howdy Doody! So ends another season. Now that Survivor is off and now AI is off – I’m going to have to find something to do to fill the time . . . . Oh, I know . . . . there’s a bar right down the street! So that’s it my fellow ART’ies. Until next year. DJ Jumper, ART President.